That Awkward Moment When – 1st Edition

That awkward moment when: you realize the only picture your former employee has of her new boyfriend is a picture of his junk.

Me: You met him at the wedding last weekend? That sounds promising. Where’s a picture?

Her (after turning fifty shades of red): Ummm, he sent me a picture, but it’s umm, err . . . not of his face.

Queue the long awkward pause where we both stare at each other horrified and she tries to squash a nervous giggle with her hands. After what seems like an eternity I manage to fix my face back to its usual I’m-at-work-and-wish-I-wasn’t expression.

Me: Swipe left when that happens. SWIPE LEFT for crying out loud!

I throw up my hands in exasperation and exit stage left.

*This story is an accurate depiction of an actual conversation had with a former employee in our place of employment. She agreed it was a hilariously absurd moment that needed to be recorded for all of eternity in the blogosphere. 

Update: Apparently we ladies are in a crisis. We are being faced with an epidemic of penis-pic exposures while simply trying to make it out there in the dating world. No sooner had I mentioned this post to my sister when she busts out a story about a girl we know who was on a first date when the guy excused himself to go to the bathroom. He took a picture of his junk at the toilet and texted it to her while she sat at the table with their meals. Hey, nothing says yum, appetizers! like a picture of what someone’s doing in the bathroom.

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