I’m Combining All The Holidays!


Today, I’m taking a certain orange political candidate’s lead, and proposing some extensive changes to our nation. For starters, Tuesday will no longer be just Election Day. Instead, we’re going to tack on a few applicable holidays from the previous weeks so we can celebrate them all while only sacrificing one frickin’ day in their honor. That’s what I call killing two birds with one stone (which is an awful saying. Who the fuck thinks it’s appropriate to be throwing stones at birds anyway? Sociopaths, that’s who.)

So, as stated, Tuesday will no longer be just Election Day in our great nation – no, no. Now it’s also going to be National Stress Awareness Day, as well as National Candy Day. Why? Because, we deserve it after suffering through this awful and seemingly never-ending campaign “season” (umm, hello? The word “season” implies this bullshit shouldn’t last more than three months, am I right?).

Here’s to all the meditation/ yoga/ deep breathing and candy/more candy/oodles  of candy you can stomach this Tuesday! We’re going to need it folks!

Confession: This is me everyday.

Oh, and while I’m at it, I’d like to give an additional shout-out to NaNoWriMo, which is keeping my fingers very busy this month, but no stress there, right? Right!?)


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